This came through the feed on Facebook today, and it really hit a nerve with me. It is beyond ignorant, and a continued slap in the face to those who cannot just “snap out of it” for those of society who tell us we should. They are usually the ones who had healthy environments as children, so it comes totally ignorant, but that is unacceptable in this day and time when we have lost so many of our loved ones to depression, drug addiction, and/or suicide. Many people still quietly suffer or end their lives without seeking help to live fuller lives, because of comments like this.
This statement is true up until the two sentences about perspective. I didn’t choose my perspective to be what I worked so hard to correct beginning at age 21, now almost 42. I fought it tooth and nail, let me tell you! The long term effects of developing in abuse and neglect as children, and/or among addictions are detrimental to the overall development of adults. Those negative environments are the root of depression, continued poverty, drug addiction, high school drop-outs, teen pregnancy, and the list goes on. Our environments as children are what shape our perspective in life, and then as adults, those who had messed up childhoods like me spend the rest of their lives trying to undo the damage.
I watched my father’s addictions, and I also watched my grandparents who were severe alcoholics until I was 14. It made me know I would break the cycle, and I did with me. However, it came with much work in discovering who I am and why, and who my brother was, and why he blew his brains out in 2014. It goes back to human development and environments we developed in as children.
The word perspective in this saying should be removed. Maybe your will to survive, but perspective, no. Trust me. I know plenty, including myself who would have cut off both arms to just make it go away, who would give just about anything to say, oh boy, let me just change my perspective here today, or better said, snap out of it. Don’t you think they would if they could? Some can, some cannot. It is hard work. It takes dedication, determination, education, a good understanding of self, and a good support system of love and loyalty to recover from trauma as a child. Being subjected to an alcoholic is traumatizing and detrimental to the long term development of humans, the same as physical and mental abuse, or being unloved by parents.
Shame on those who live in the belief of this statement, or the mindset of snapping out of it. It is not so cut and dry, trust me.