Helicopters

It is liberating to hear a helicopter flying nearby without the sheer feeling of panic overcoming me. In 2004, my nephew was involved in a horrible car wreck that left him nearly dead on his 13th birthday. I had just talked to him that morning, and I loved him always like my own. He did die, but thankfully, one man kept working with him and revived him. One lady died. Thank God this one firefighter/EMT who just so happened to be working off duty at a nursery where the wreck ended up was able to radio for three helicopters. This allowed my nephew to be in surgery within 21 minutes at the best hospital for children in Atlanta. We all got there pretty quickly, and the next day, I believe, or a few days after, my sister was able to get us permission to go up and watch them bring in a patient by life flight, the same as my nephew had been brought in. I think she needed to see that for her own closure, and I went with her for support. I did not realize how much it would affect me. Certainly, I’m not trying to be the focus here, but from then on, each time I would hear a helicopter, my whole body would tingle, my ears would ring, my face would get blood hot feeling, and I would have this desparate urge to panic. I never did, thankfully, but I always had to make contact with immediate family members when I would hear a helicopter. I could not rest until I did. I have overcome that in the last nine months. During this time, I have realized there is nothing I can do about what is going to happen. I have realized that I am all I need to survive. Although, my husband runs a close race to me in taking care of me. I cannot imagine my life without him. I have learned to pray and let go. My next fear to overcome, flying and heights. I am deathly afraid of heights. Haha!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply